Seeking advice after ending a long term relationship? Maybe all you need to do is look into yourself. Or maybe not – you really have to dig deep and not just look.
Whatever you hear as you search for guidance after ending a long term relationship, soon enough you’ll find out that you already had it all inside you. However, the problem is, your self is caught up in too much jumble right after a break-up and it’s normal. Especially when the split up is from what was once a deep and almost lasting one, you would find it necessary to re-view some suggestions after ending a long term relationship. This is important. Perhaps more important than the break-up itself, since the end of one relationship will lead the way for a new relationship. You’re in a transition stage, yet you’re all mixed up. You do need counsel after ending a long term relationship.
It’s perfectly normal that you start questioning and blaming yourself after a break-up. But with all your might, you must try to avoid looking back at your actions, the way you look, or what you said too negatively, to the point of holding you back into trying for a new relationship. This is the first suggestion after ending a long term relationship: Don’t hold yourself down. Don’t be stuck in the past; but instead, use it to move you forward. People will come and go in your life and it’s just okay. Remember, life is all about change. Therefore, don’t even try to think of returning to what you already lost. Commit your mind that it’s finally over.
But what about your heart? That’s the second most crucial advice after ending a long term relationship: Suffer the pain of the break-up. Cry, yes, but not forever. It may take a long time before your heart heals and opens for another love, but take your time. You wouldn’t want to jump right in at once and end-up retreating out of fear or committing the same mistakes all over again. Give yourself a breather – slow heal. If not, take control of your recovery – learn the advantages of the break-up, discover more about yourself, and increase your self-esteem.
Third advice after ending a long term relationship: Give yourself an opportunity to start over again, and start. Never chant ‘I’ll never let anyone hurt me ever again… I’ll never love again’, because you still can, and this time without getting hurt again, which leads us to the fourth advice: Prepare yourself before deciding to jump back to the dating pool. To ensure you won’t get hurt again, forget your failure guilt by renewing yourself. Learn from the past and use it for the future. You might find it helpful joining group therapies to put things into the right perspective. Or, seek advice from your loved-ones. This will help you look back positively, recognizing that unless you went through the break-up, then finding your true love would not happen. Replacement is guaranteed if only you would truly allow it.
Filed under: Relationship Improvement